The Hungry Hungry Writer

Here are three swimming tips for any aspiring swimmers (www.active.com):

“The swim must be relaxed, allowing you to move through the water with the least expenditure of energy reserves.”

“The swim must be fast enough to get you to the bike leg in a reasonable amount of time, depending on your personal goals for the race.”

“The swim must be controlled, so you keep a feeling of confidence throughout the leg, staying positive leading in to the transition and bike portion of the event.”

Three tips. I didn’t accomplish any of them.

I tried to convince myself that this was just a petty little triathlon with no meaning in my life: So what if I quit? It wouldn’t bother me. It was a stupid little Tri that I wasn’t really prepared for. I was doing everything you do when you want to quit. But there’s a reason why I try to CONVINCE myself to quit. It’s because I really don’t want to.

If I turned back to shore and quit it would haunt me for the rest of my life. Yeah… it would haunt me. No matter how hard I tried to convince myself that I should quit I’m not sure I could ever

I know I wasn’t going to die out on the lake. I was just taking longer than I should due to anxiety and panic attacks. A common thing with beginner Triathletes. The bottom line is dealing with these unexpected (or expected) events. But today - it beat me. The mental anguish I was going through because I was unable to perform like I expected weighed on me. I was supposed get into the water and, despite resting here or there on my back, finish just like I would finish in the gym pool. It was easy. Simple. 400 yards. Piece of cake!

But it wasn’t even a piece of candy.

Quitting sounded really good. But that’s a hard sell for me. I already have two DNS (did not show) on paid events and now a DNF? The two Tris that I ‘did not show’ for weren’t really in my control. A DNF in this event would be a horrible side note to my early Tri-career! There is something I have discovered about myself. I’ve discovered that I find it hard to quit. No matter the torture. Even when I feel I’m at the verge of virtual collapse.

I got back on my stomach and back to the swim path just as the 2nd wave swarmed over me. Talk about adding salt to an open wound. Now there were more bodies to bump into, more bodies to kick, and more bodies to swim past me.

At least now I had something to follow. And I did my best to keep up. It was still like swimming with a blindfold, but I followed the flow and pulled the water under me and swam. I tried to grab a draft from someone. But that didn’t help since they were faster and I couldn’t even keep up.

I was supposed to relax. Just like one of those tips from www.active.com. Ha. Yeah. Relax. I was dealing with a bout of claustrophobia, I was scared and I had a panic attack in the water. I was also kicking my legs like my life depended on it. So this is when I remember to play ‘the name game’.

You start with a name, ‘Glenn’, and you come up with another name that starts with the last letter in that name; that would be ‘N’. I tried to come up with a name after every three strokes or breath. Glenn, Nancy, Yang, Gordon, Nick, Kelly, Young, Greg, George, Ethan, Nigel, Lenny… As I swam it seemed like so many names ended in Y, G, or N. I was struggling with NOT repeating names. But in order to keep up with my stroke cadence if I had to repeat a name I did. I remember using Otto twice, I used Nick more than once, Yang and Young and Yung were repeated, I repeated several names and came up with some unusual ones like: Octavio, Aurora, Kitahara…

The ‘name game’ works. I can’t remember the final turn to the finish. I can’t remember swimming the last fifty or so meters. I can’t remember the last six or so minutes. All I remember was getting on my feet, weak from the unnecessary kicking, and I walked toward the cheering crowd that waited for all the many swimmers.

I struggled out of the water. I pulled down the zipper of my wetsuit and grabbed the swim cap off my head. I pulled my goggles off and scanned the crowd for Donna and the rest of my family. Were they worried? Did they think they missed me coming out of the water? I wanted to give them a thumbs up – tired as I was – I wanted them to see that I did it. My first ‘regular’ tri swim. My first ‘semi’ open water swim. Maybe they are at the transition area. Maybe I just missed them.

The fastest male swimmer finished the swim portion in less than five minutes. Less than five minutes to do 400 yards. Wow. I wasn’t even half way at the five minute mark!

Goals… Goals… Goals… It may seem like the swim took an hour or so for me. It felt like an. My goal was UNDER 10 minutes. 9 minutes tops. My final time was: 13 min 51 sec. That’s all. But yeah, it felt like an eternity. 13 minutes is a long ass time. Doesn’t look like it on paper, but do something for 13 minutes straight. Hang from a pull up bar for 13 minutes and fight for every second. Talk in front of a crowd for 13 minutes. Shoot baskets for 13 minutes straight… You’ll be praying for it to end way before the 13 minute mark.

The first leg of the triathlon took away my legs. I had a bike ride and a run to go and my legs were so tired I knew I was going to use the bike to rest. My plan was to conserve energy on the swim and put it all out on the bike and then take the run as it comes. Even if my legs were jelly after the bike, I already know after a mile or so I’d be able to pick up my run pace. So that was my plan. A very straightforward and positive plan. But that changed and the only positive thing about the triathlon so far was that I was not dead.

I made it.

Now… the Bike…