The Hungry Hungry Writer

It’s my favorite Holiday!

I hate that the year goes by so damn fast. But the reward is Thanksgiving and Christmas. And Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday by far. Why? Well, I get a 4 day weekend. I get to eat a ton of food for 4 days and a few days after the weekend. There’s wine, there’s turkey, there’s friends and family, maybe a movie will be thrown in, and there are so many things to be thankful for.

This year is different though. We lost a family member.

My uncle died on Saturday just after sunset. They speculate he waited till after sunset (his Sabbath) to die. His son (my cousin Elvin) said to him, “It’s okay dad… you can go…” and tears came from my uncle’s closed eyes. It was as if he heard him and us. Then within a few minutes (5:05 PM) he died. It was very sad.

There were over 60+ people at the hospital when he died. People were trying to view him from the outside window. It was standing room only. I counted around 30 of my family just in the room alone as he took his last breath with other cousins rushing to get there.

He was a man of prestige to the community and to friends and family. He was looked up to. He was respected. He was the leader of our family.

This Thanksgiving and the four days off will be filled with remembering my uncle. We can all give thanks to him for being a steadfast leader, someone who would never turn his back on anyone, and someone who respected everyone despite their faults. He loved life. He loved people and above all, he loved his family.

I have so many memories of him and how I wish I got into his mind a little during his later years. I’d love to have his many years of memories. From the Japanese invasion of Philippines in the 1940s during WWII, to the many stories he had as a teacher, pastor, writer, father and the oldest living brother to many brothers and sisters – four sisters here in the states and a brother and sister still in the Philippines. He was like a father to everyone.

He wanted to live till 90. He died at 86.

Needless to say, I am at a loss of words. I am compelled to write so many thoughts. So many thanks to my uncle. So many feelings and emotions about life, death, family, and the pursuit of happiness. My uncle could have given me so much insight if I sought it. I took for granted that he would always be there and at anytime I wanted he’d be ready to answer my questions and give me guidance.

He was the leader of our family. He always led Thanksgiving and Christmas day prayers. Jake asked me as I drove home from the hospital, “Who’s going to pray for us now?” I had no answer.

So it’s Thanksgiving. My uncle died. It’s hard to be thankful on this holiday. But I am.

I am thankful for my uncle and what he meant to this family and what he meant to me.

Thanks Uncle Gely (Hely)…

Thanks for the quarters every Friday…

Thanks for the Thrifty’s ice cream cones…

Thanks for the long boring prayers…

I’ll miss you.

That’s all I have.

My uncle… Ban Alsaybar. Rest in peace.

The other night my son asked me if I was a Ninja. I thought for a second and replied, “If I was one I wouldn’t be able to tell you because being a ninja is supposed to be a secret.”

“You are then!” he proclaimed. “That’s why you said that.” He tends to over analyze sometimes.

“Well, like I said, if I was I couldn’t tell you.”

“I can’t believe that you’re a Ninja and you won’t tell me!”

“I never said I was a Ninja.”

“You’re just trying to trick me with what you said which means you are one!”

It went on and on like that until I added: “Well, if that’s what you think. But think about it - what else am I going to be since I’m not a Jedi anymore?”

He looked at me like, “That makes sense.” And walked away.

I’m not a Ninja. There’s no such thing. I do wield an intimidating light-saber though.

Speaking of Ninja…

For 18 years I was a serious martial artist. Well, it started when I was 18 and ended when I was about 36 years old. I would work out and fight every single night if I could. It was tough after college but I was always training – taking a few weeks breaks here and there but coming back to the dojo and my ‘Master’ or ‘Shihan’ time and time again. Finally, after 18 years, I earned my black belt. Unfortunately it wasn’t from my Shihan but from his very first black belt who studied with him 40 years ago – Sensei Larry Delano administrating the test, witnessed by Sensei Michael Pecina and Grand Master James Ibrao of www.thebelt.com.

Yes, 18 years. It really didn’t matter… most of Shihan’s loyal students were black belt capable fighters when they were simple purple belts (including me). And the ‘loyal’ ones didn’t really care so much about ‘the belt’, they just wanted to learn as much as they could and fight hard every Friday night. The students that were in it for belts usually didn’t last long – and usually went to ‘bigger’ more commercialized schools. No biggy… It just meant we had our Shihan to ourselves more often.

From what I know, Shihan is still teaching in a small school in Eagle Rock. Boy, did he make fighters out of us. We were rough, we were tough and we could fight all night long back at the Atwater Dojo in the 80s! He always had a small school with limited number of students.

In the 80s I always walked into a tournament where the patch I wore on my Gi would already strike fear into opponents. It wasn’t just about scoring points with a side kick or backhand to the face – it was what happened if you got in the way of our sidekicks setup by a backhand to the face. Older martial artists’ who trained under Shihan like Jim Kelly, Joe Lewis, and Bob Wall, made that kick famous back in the 60s and 70s.

It was a different time back then too. It wasn’t about belts, and politics. It was about the art and learning as much as you could learn.

Those were good old times.

My son and daughter want me to teach them Karate. I feel they’d learn more if I teach them – but there are valuable things you can get from being in a class with other kids. I think I can get them on their way to learning the basic techniques and katas and get them ahead of the curve before searching for the right style for them.

To me, that’s still an issue. There has to be a reason why they learn a martial art – and there has to be validity in every move they do. Understanding each move is just as important as performing it. They have to learn Martial Arts as a self-defense, as a disciplined art, and have to be dedicated to it for the art – and not for the belts. But that’s personal. How to ingrain that in anybody is a challenge. The true martial arts practitioners out there don’t care about what color belt they wear, they care about what knowledge they can bring to others.

And if there’s one discipline I’d recommend to anyone, it’s Okinawa Te Karate. The Master, my master, Shihan - Gordon Doversola, taught me for most of those 18 years. I learned a lot about life, health, family, dedication and I respect him tremendously. Look for him. I’m sure he’s still teaching in a small dojo in Eagle Rock. Tell him Glenn sent you. He’ll make a fighter out of you. And maybe you too could be a ninja! Shhh… just don’t tell anybody!